UK Life Part 10: My Husband Got a Babyblues (Oh No!)

Assalamualaikum

Hello again

I want to share about how I can survive as a new mom at the second and third months after giving birth. At the first month, as I wrote in my previous blog. It was amazing experiences, however at the second month there are some new challenges that made me feel tired but fortunately, we can through it. #Alhamdulillah

my little snow white

Moreover, as a master student, I plan to finish my study on time. So two weeks after giving birth, I was back to school. Even though, I was still feel in pain and even can't walk straight because of my stitches. Yes, I'm kind of determined person when I pursuing something that I really want which is my master degree. (some friend of mine told me that I'm a stubborn lady hahaha). However, I believe that an education is a big investment for my future and my next generations. And there is no knowledge that can be useless. It's time for women to be educated in many ways. It's not only about pursuing a formal education but also it could be informal such as learn how to design, sewing, cooking, even yoga or makeup. as long as the objective to do it is for goodness and/or become financially independent to support our family or others.

When I was back to school in early March of 2017, I left my baby with my husband. At the first month, there were no problems. My baby could drink my express milk by use bottle. But then, after spring break. She started not to like to drink by a bottle. It was so frustrated because I need to go to school. I can't leave my baby, I was worried if she is hungry and my husband can't handle when she's cry. FYI, my baby's cry is so loud haha.

mommy & baby

We tried to change the types of bottle and it was useless. my baby seems to forget how to sucks the milk by bottle. The reason is maybe that I gave her milk directly from my breast during a whole month of spring break. So, it makes her forget how to suck milk from the bottle. The solution is when I have to leave for study, my husband gives her milk by using silicon spoon (My friend named Tyan recommend this). It works, although the amount is not as mush as when my baby sucks from my breast directly. However, it helps to avoid her feel hungry while I'm away from her. After 3 hours away, I have to get back from school and then I give her breastfeeding. The consequence is I can't go away for too long from my baby. I can only away from her for 3-4 hours. Therefore, until now we always giving her milk by silicon spoon and give her a bottle to remain her how to sucks by a bottle at least once a day (Besides breastfeeding). Hopefully, she can suck milk from the bottle soon. 

Then, another special moment is when her first vaccine. The doctor said that don't wait until she got a fever to give her a paracetamol. However, after a vaccine, she looked so lame and we gave her paracetamol for three times with four to six hours interlude. On the next day, she got better.

When my baby got fever after vaccine

The other challenge is my baby's' head shape. We are worried about her head shape tend to flat because she always sleeps on the left side. We bring her to General Practic (Dokter umum in Indonesian), and they told me that she is still normal. We should wait until she is a year. because she will start to move and roll over that will make the head shape develop to become more around.

Furthermore, because we are a new parent who far away from our home country and lack of baby things experiences. We are too worried about our baby's development. Then, it makes my husband got baby blues. He got sick for two days because too worried.  Although, I found my husband is a great new dad. He can take care Karenina (My baby's name), while I'm gone. When he got a baby blues, it affects me too. Because I have to take care the baby and home by myself, it was so tired! The impact of that situation made my milk becomes less. I initiated to talk to him about what bothers him. Then he said that he's too worried if something bad happens to our baby (So sweet). After we discussed and got the solution that we need helps. We contact our parents from Indonesia and they agreed to come to visit us on next July. 

my husband take my baby's shower

However, I just realized that a baby blues not only happen to a new mom but also can happen to any member of our family. Based on my experience, yes my husband got it. But it was solved.  We raise our baby like a team work, I do the house-baby things and always awake in the night, then my husband cooks for us (he cooks better than me, and fortunately he loves to cook). When we have our coursework or need to study, we organize our schedule and alternately take care the baby. #alhamdulillah

Three of us

All in all, having a baby is not an easy stuff but by a good collaboration with your husband, you will can through it. Believe me, we are fighting the same fight! It's okay to be wrong, we all are learners of life. When you can solve the challenges, it feels so great and wonderful. You will realize how strong you are hehe and how your family loves you especially your husband/partners. And don't forget to be thankful even you are in the middle of high pressure being a new parent.😘

get ready to  swim

Thank you for reading my blog, my next blog is about the study tips as a new mom.

Regards

UKT
Instagram: @umikawiryani